There was a momentary lull as Anita studied her father’s expression again.“So, what’s up?”, she wanted to know.“Nothing really, Sweetheart. ... guess I’m still wallowing in some more of that self-pity. I mean, here we are, me in a bit of a rut, and you working your butt off trying to get ahead. On top of all that, you’re stuck babysitting a broken-down, old has-been of a father. Your mother got smart and left! As a father, I haven’t done a very good job, so far. I sometimes wonder how long before. She said no at first but I told her that I felt really bad and it was the least I could do to make up for my clumsiness." Finally, she said, well ok, I wouldn't want you to have a lasting trauma because of my ankle. She put her foot up into my lap and I satrted to slowly massage her foot and ankle. I introduced myself and found out that her name was kathy. We started talking about all the things to do on bayshore and i admitted that I had seen her many times. I even told her about the ways. Every so often we fucked. Then like acold-blooded killer I'd go home and call Tam as if nothing had happened.Did I feel ashamed or guilty?Yes. Sometimes.Did I feel attractive and wanted?Yes to that, too. A lot.Being awakened to other possibilities was changing me as surely as magichad a long, long time ago. And as winter faded and the weather turnedmellow, Michelle Cho and I hit the skatepark a lot more. I'd gotten usedto the idea I'd peaked and would never be as good as the girls whoturned. ‘Ok ladies lets gets those clothes off ‘the trainer saidAs I looked at Ainsley and then towards the other women I then began to gather up the courage to start taking my clothes off but only 15 minutes in 1 woman walked out only saying that she will not degrade herself down to this which was followed by 2 more women leaving. With 12 women left we just stood there until suddenly one of the trainers came and grabbed one of the girls and pulled her to the front for everyone to watch, soon after he.
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